Have you ever seen someone get out of a car parked in a space reserved for people with disabilities, who did not LOOK disabled? Did it make you feel very uncomfortable or even upset? Did you let them know of your disapproval by giving them a dirty look or yelling at them?
Well, you are not alone. Many people are very disturbed by the sight of a seemingly mobile person taking the space of someone who is truly in need of it. After all, we want to protect the rights of people for whom these spaces are reserved!
However, in our efforts to help those who deserve these parking spaces, we actually may be hurting someone who has a legal right and a legitimate need to park there. How can this be true, you ask? Isn’t it obvious who does and who does not have a disability?
Let me share the following story about my wife, Sherri.
It was a weekend afternoon, and Sherri wanted to head to the department store to pick up some items. She knew that driving would be tough enough, but she felt spending time with her niece would be worth the difficulty of the trip.
Sherri and her niece pulled into the store parking lot, and she drove around until she found an accessible spot near the front. Sherri pulled out her accessible placard and placed it on the back of the mirror. She then proceeded into the store with her niece to shop.
Once inside, they looked for an electric motorized cart. They located one and proceeded around the store. Of course, being in her late twenties and looking much younger, Sherri would elicit stares from people wondering why she was using the cart. Some even wondered out loud, especially children who would point and ask “Mommy, what’s wrong with her?”
Why anyone would ride one of the store scooters unless they really needed it is beyond me. Sherri’s scooter at home goes 8 miles an hour and has head lights, tail lights and a headrest. The mall carts crawl along slowly, and everyone stares at you.
Sherri and her niece finished up their shopping and returned to their car. Sherri started the car and looked in the mirror and noticed a police car with its lights flashing right behind her, blocking her in. There was an immediate knock on her window. Startled, she rolled down her window and an officer stated that she was not allowed to park there, because she was not handicapped.
Sherri said that the placard was hers and she handed the officer her license, her placard registration and a multiple sclerosis (MS) card. Sherri mentioned that she had the right to park there, because she was disabled with MS and had gotten approval from her doctor and the motor vehicle department.
The officer replied, “I don’t care how many multiple problems you have, you can’t park there. I saw you walk inside and back to the car, and you looked fine to me.”
After about 10 minutes of trying to explain her disability to the officer, Sherri started to get quite frustrated. She then asked very politely for the officer’s name and badge number, and if he would please move his car. Of course, her nervous system started to work overtime and her brain went into fight or flight mode. Luckily for the officer, he said he would move his car. Then he stated, “See those people over in that Cadillac, they are not handicapped either.
The conclusion of the story is that the officer was eventually reprimanded for the way he was hassling people who had the legitimate right to park in accessible parking.
The general qualifications for accessible parking spaces include those using wheelchairs, walkers, crutches, canes and assist dogs. Nonetheless, most of us do not realize they also include certain impaired functions of the heart or lungs, as well as conditions which are worsened to a specified impairment by walking a certain distance.
People with a variety of disabilities may qualify to park in these spots. Moreover, not all impairments are readily evident to the onlooker. Because of this, we refer to conditions which cause debilitating symptoms that are not so apparent from the outside as “invisible disabilities.”
There are millions of people who are forced to contend with serious illnesses, injuries and circumstances, which have left them with mountains to climb every time they take a step. Most people do not realize a person can have hindrances on the inside, which may not be visible on the outside. Their restrictions may not be conspicuous at a glance, but their pain, limitations and inability to function normally can be debilitating.
What may seem easy to you may seem like a 14,000 foot hurdle to them. Many even collapse in stores, become very dizzy and weak or even black-out. Being able to park close to the entrance of a building when they need to allows them to run an errand they otherwise would not have been able to conquer.
At any rate, the purpose of accessible spaces is to assist those with many types of disabilities and health conditions. For those with various types of limitations, the spots help make it possible for them to shop or visit the doctor.
How do you know who can park in an accessible space and who cannot? Look for a temporary or permanent placard in the front window or a disabled license plate. These items are received after an application, which is completed by a patient’s doctor, is approved by the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV).
Each state’s DMV has specific guidelines and requirements the person must meet in order to receive a placard or license plate. Most states take into consideration the impairments due to certain conditions, as well as the implications stemming from aggravations of these conditions. Therefore, if a person is issued a license and is displaying it, then they have the legal, medical right to park there.
The following are few assumptions regarding accessible parking:
- Assumption 1 – Drivers can simply request a placard from the DMV without any proof or documentation.
Drivers cannot request an accessible plate or placard without a form completed by a licensed physician and with their verifiable license number.
- Assumption 2 – Doctors are irresponsibly filling out forms for patients.
Doctors have no personal gain by doing so.
- Assumption 3 – Drivers are borrowing a placard from a relative.
Many people believe this happens often, but do not personally know anyone doing so. At any rate, we cannot assume someone is using a placard that does not belong to them, because they do not “look” like they have a disability.
If someone personally knows an individual who has stolen or borrowed a placard, they can file a complaint with the DMV. If we have further concerns with the application and qualification process, we should consider using the legislative process to address them, rather than confronting individuals in a parking lot.
Chances are the person displaying a placard or plate is in fact parked legally and needs the space for physical and/or medical reasons. As you can imagine, it is difficult enough to live with such illnesses, injuries and disabilities that wreak havoc in one’s life without being harassed every time one needs to go shopping or to the doctor. Finally, if a person is displaying a license to park in an accessible parking space, try offering a hand, instead of a visual judgment. After all…the people you are graciously intending to defend may be standing right in front of you!
By Wayne Connell, Founder and President of the Invisible Disabilities Association
ORDER IDA’s Pamphlet, Don’t Judge by Appearances!
This article was first published on Disability.Blog by Disability.gov. October 31, 2012.
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I can certainly relate to this article! Many times in the past 20 years, I have felt good, walked into a department store, found no motorized carts available and because I only needed a few items, went on to find what I needed. Once, I had a paralysis suddenly, while trying to reach a bench in the pharmacy area. I was totally paralyzed, and requested that no one even try to help me to get back on my feet, because it would stress my muscles and perhaps cause permanent damage. Other times, I would get so spaced out from the exposure to multiple chemical odors, and stagger, if I did not have a motorized chair. I have had the checkout persons call an ambulance on me several times because of my being disoriented. This doesn’t happen as severe now that I am on three different medications to help manage this rare disease. Today, I felt great, walked into the store, waited more than 10 minutes for a cart to become available, and when one was, it was taken by someone else and when I spoke up that I had been waiting a long time, I was scowled at. I had to struggle to get back to my car, (not in a handicapped space, as none was available) and get my own scooter out to use. I was already weak but needed to get items from the store. I have a rare disease called Hypokalemic Periodic Paralysis, and I never know what or when a “trigger” can cause weakness, shortness of breath or paralysis. I have learned to cope. There are many others worldwide, who also have this disease that struggle also with their friends and family not recognizing that this disease is real!.
I am intimately aware of this problem, being afflicted with a form of EB, epidermiasis bulosa. Not being able to walk long distances, totally determined by seasonal temperatures, my skin will blister under conditions that are totally normal for everyone else. I usually try and use regular parking when I am not experiencing difficulty, but sometimes it is hard to judge, even after having this condition my whole life. The doctor that issued my parking permit had never seen a previous case of this and had never even heard of the disability before. I totally empathize with anyone facing an ambulatory issue arising from an ‘invisible’ disability. Try and not judge unless you’ve been there yourself.
Wayne, thank you for writing this! Reading about Sherri’s encounter still made me shudder. I wrote a story years ago about a similar experience (http://livingwithcfs.com/privilege-and-prejudice-disabled-parking-with-an-invisible-illness/).
I so appreciate all the wonderful work you do on behalf of people with invisible disabilities…thank you!
Thank you Wayne for this post. I certainly agree with you on this! I think it is great that well-meaning people are trying to stick up for the rights of those with VISIBLE disabilities, however, those of us with invisible illness and disability can suffer because of it. I liked your assumptions list. What your wife had to experience with that cop is ridiculous and sad because it is a terrible case of ignorance and prejudice. I am loving this site. Keep up the good work! 🙂
This was a great article. I too have had the police called on me, because I was able to walk into the store. No one realizes that I must instantly use a shopping cart in order to walk around in the store. I don’t bring my walker when I need to do a lot of shopping because a shopping cart holds more items. I have also had the “elderly” leave nasty notes on my car saying that I should not park there. In a doctor’s office – one of the doctors told me that I couldn’t park in a handicapped spot & I was trying to get a toddler into the office with me.
No one can see the support I wear on my leg (in the winter, my pants cover it) and no one can see my heart and lung condition from the outside. I think the doctor was the one that angered me the most because a doctor should know about certain medical conditions.
You are so cute! I know how you feel though I have degenerative disc disease, chiari malformation (had to have decompression “brain” surgery), and a brain tumor. All of the problems that I have are invisible to someone who doesn’t know me.
I also have degenerative disc disease, L5S1 with sciatica going down the right leg, my leg weakens and have always caught myself before I’ve fallen, recently diagnosed with IT band syndrome, I have a handicap parking pass and was confronted by a man that didn’t think I needed it, of course as he was walking away, so I went up to his vehicle and asked him if he wanted to see my scars from back surgery and that my leg gives out on me, he didn’t have much to say after that, I’m guessing he won’t say anything to anyone ever again.
I also have an invisible illness. Intracrainal Hypertension (IH) and have a Lumbarpertional shunt which drains excess spinal fluid from my lower spine into my abdomen. I have problems with my vision and balance. Due to severe debilitating headaches and constant ringing in my ears which is worse with ANY movement I am unable to do so many things I always enjoyed…After my last surgery my doctor gave me a handicapped placard. My first trip to town in almost a year I walk into the store with assistance from my husband, use the stores electric cart. When I returned to my car someone had keyed it from the front bumper on the drivers side all the way down to the back bumper…I was in SHOCK…we had just purchased the car 2 weeks earlier (because it was easier for me to get in & out) the car was 4 years old but NEW to me! The police were called, we watched the store video and you can see an elderly man watching us as we get out of the car and enter the store, you can see him walk around the parking lot and come back to our car and key it, but he parked where the cameras couldn’t see his car or licenses. Almost $3,000 in damage, my heart was broken! Being on a fixed income my car still carries the scratch, and my heart is still broken! How can anyone have so much HATE in them? Every day I think of and pray for this man and his anger, I allowed him to take my freedom from me! I finally see…he is more disabled than me! and I forgive him…
I am so thankful to have found this website. I must admit that prior to being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerois in 2003 I had looked at people parked in a handicapped spot, who weren’t in wheelchairs, and was suspicious. I was totally unaware of invisible diseases and was making a snap judgement. I have never been approached by anyone when I get out of my car parked in the handicapped spot. But I am sure that I am getting judged in the same way I used to judge others. Sometimes I do not know which is worse for me, the fatigue, pain, balance problems or dealing with the lack of compassion because “I look good.”
I am so happy that I came across this website. I too have disabilities that are not always physically visible. I am in my forties, but look younger than my age. I have had so many horrible encounters with elderly people because I use handicap parking legally. I have a handicap placard and license. My most recent experience was in my doctor’s parking lot. I drove around for 30 minutes before someone vacated a handicap parking spot. When I pulled in I saw an elderly woman drive by and give me a dirty look. She drove around again staring at me and waited till I got out of my car. She said some awful things to me and when I pointed out that my handicap placard is clearly visible, she commented, oh well you know you will get a very expensive ticket for what you are doing. I was feeling bad to start with, this person who does not know me has judged me and now has made me late for my doctor’s appointment. I do not feel that I have to justify my illness to strangers. I hope the angry people that judge us are reading these comments.
Thanks for sharing information about invisible disabilities! I wish more people could be informed.
I am young & look healthy. On my “good” days when I am able to get out of bed I even walk upright without a hint if disability.
I have a progressive form of SLE/LUPUS and on numerous occasions when I use my placard I have been treated harshly. I can handle it but its hard to explain when witnessed by my kids. I have been stared at, yelled at, sworn at, SPIT at, even had a lady about 50 swear at me & punch my car…
I then acquired a photo ID from the State DMV that indicated I was disabled. Yet even after showing that I have been told that if I am young and not in a wheelchair, I had to park elsewhere. I even had a State Transit Worker force me to stand instead of sitting on the handicapped bench to ride on a mass transit train. That was AFTER he saw my ID and placard!! Like others before him, he explained that “my disability” wasn’t “bad enough” since clearly he could see me walk just fine…
What they don’t usually see is how the sun/heat can cause me to black out and end up covered with rashes. The cold, well it just causes me pain.
I have given up shopping altogether. My husband does it now. But I still have Doctor appointments and times I have to go out.
I just wish everyone could learn to treat each other with unconditional respect. Without assumptions or judgements. I am not angry and have no hatred for those people who judged me unfairly. After-all, for all I know they have their OWN disability. They must be so sad or full of hate. Or at least that’s what I tell my children….
Heck, yeah! In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if people with respiratory illnesses, etc. aren’t at least as likely to need the disabled spaces as people who use assistive devices. I have hyperekplexia and essential vertigo from basilar migraine, and walk with forearm crutches. I have a placard I use only if I’m especially weak or unsteady, or am in a crowded or chaotic environment (triggers for days…) The rest of the time, I need all the exercise I can get! It’s entirely possible someone would see me walking in with the crutches from the back of the parking lot one day while someone who doesn’t “look disabled” used a disabled spot, and then, the next day (if it’s a Bad One for me) see me use the spot, too, while the other person was able to walk in from the back because they were having a Good Day. I wish more people could understand just how “fuzzy” disabilities can be!
handicap parking permits aren’t just for people with problems walking. that is such a misconception. there are plenty of other disabilities & health problems that can affect the way people are able to move or restrict or severely limit their mobility or activity. basically, if someone meets the criteria necessary to acquire a parking permit/placard/license plate- who is anyone to judge or make that person feel bad? they have enough problems without you adding to them. just be thankful for what you have & move along!